Financial Independence Daily FI discussion thread - November 03, 2020 |
- Daily FI discussion thread - November 03, 2020
- 5 years later... I feel like FIRE has kinda messed me up
- COASTING with 1m
| Daily FI discussion thread - November 03, 2020 Posted: 03 Nov 2020 12:08 AM PST Please use this thread to have discussions which you don't feel warrant a new post to the sub. While the Rules for posting questions on the basics of personal finance/investing topics are relaxed a little bit here, the rules against memes/spam/self-promotion/excessive rudeness/politics still apply! Have a look at the FAQ for this subreddit before posting to see if your question is frequently asked. Since this post does tend to get busy, consider sorting the comments by "new" (instead of "best" or "top") to see the newest posts. [link] [comments]  |
| 5 years later... I feel like FIRE has kinda messed me up Posted: 03 Nov 2020 09:33 AM PST Around 10 years ago I loved my job as a programmer, it was one of those rare 'even if I won the lottery, I'd still want to come here every day' scenarios. It was around this time I found out about ERE. The idea of retiring early wasn't appealing, but financial freedom definitely was - I sold my car, tightened my spending and invested what I could. A little while later I moved departments, and suddenly my job sucked. I really hated going in every day. But hey, that's what I was investing for right? It turns out due to a combination of things (mostly luck with stocks, crypto and property) I wasn't too far away from my retirement number. When I finally hit it, I decided to stay at my job for a little while longer and build up a buffer - but I was completely checked out. It turns out a combination of hating your job and not needing to be there doesn't work so well, and it wasn't long before I lost my job (not due to poor performance which was apparently fine, but due to spending lots of my days browsing even though I knew internet usage was monitored). My FIRE years were actually pretty good - I did try employment with a friend but quit due to suffering pretty bad impostor syndrome, I spent a lot of time volunteering, did up a few properties and even started a family. I was toying with the idea of getting a job in the future because my wife thought it'd be a good example to show to our son - I'm still in the very early days of training to become a counsellor and it's not really working out. Anyway, fast forward to now - an imminent divorce means that unless I want to live ultra frugally (which I don't) I need to start earning again. The problem is that I have a 5 year gap in my CV, and thanks to how I acted in my previous two jobs no usable references either. I also have zero confidence or motivation, and this is something that's only gotten worse the longer I've been out of work. I've always been pretty lazy but I am actually a nightmare now and I have no idea how to change. I just have no drive at all. Obviously there are/were issues even without FIRE, but it's massively exacerbated them and left me wondering where to go next. I've even found myself applying for some minimum wage jobs and haven't even heard back regarding an interview. Right now I am feeling like I'm going back into the workplace without any real usable skills, experience or references. Has anyone else found themselves in a similar position? How did it work out for you? [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 03 Nov 2020 07:43 AM PST This is a throwaway account. I am a married entrepreneur who has almost $1.1m in index funds. I also have about 2 years of living expenses saved. House is not paid off, but mortgage is inexpensive in LCOL area. Was making $300k the past couple of years (between $150-250 the years before that) pre-Covid. Since Covid, my business has been shattered as a direct result of the state shutting us down for so long. Right now, in the middle of Covid, I'm expecting to net about $100k this year. My mental state has also been shattered. I have not enjoyed life in 10 YEARS due to the hectic nature of my business. Every moment of my life was poured into growing my business, at the expense of my marriage, relationships with family, and myself. Now, the business has been destroyed and I don't know if I can ever build it back up to where it was before—nor if I want to. I am realizing that I poured my entire life into something to the point of anxiety/depression and that it's probably not a manageable long term plan. However, it was helping me save for preferably close to fatFire. My wife and I live in a LCOL area, but do probably spend about $80-$85k a year. My wife works with me and that almost makes me resentful. She started working with me when my business got up to $300k a year. She hated her $30k a year job and I felt lucky that we were in a financial position to allow her to quit her job and join me. Now, I sometimes feel angry that she doesn't have her own job. If she could bring in another $30-50k a year + health insurance, that would take some pressure off of me. Her entire salary could go into our retirement and I wouldn't have to worry about building the business back up so much—whatever happens, happens. The idea of COASTing is just so desirable because it would let me feel like some of the pressure is off and if business does go south, at least we'll be OK and able to FIRE sometime in the future. I feel very privileged to be able to make the money that I do (even now in the middle of a pandemic), doing what I do (health and recreation field), and if I ever have to stop doing it, I would definitely not be making 6 figures in a different career. That idea is scary. Does anyone have any suggestions? I'm not dumb, I know I can COAST and maybe FIRE in 10 years with $80k a year. I'm looking more for perspective and insight from anyone going through or has gone through similar. Anyone who can relate to any of this? It's eating me up and the uncertainty is making me crazy. Edit: the hardest thing to me is the idea that I am ok and I can chill out. After running non-stop for 10 years and reaching a salary I never thought it possible to reach, I am finding it impossible to accept slowing down. Thank you. [link] [comments]  |
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